Because I'm A Girl

Initally, I thought this video was sung by the 80s rock group, KISS.. apparently, not..

This video is ultra sweet, and even though I couldn't understand the lyrics, the images speak so much louder.

*sighs..


KISS - Because I'm A Girl

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Hazel posted YouTubes of High School Musical in her blog...
another *sigh

Tagged

Tanis tagged me in his blog.. so here goes...

4 jobs you've had:
1 SK 1st Kagawad of Barangay Dona Josefa (since 4th year high until present)
2 English Tutor (two years ago)
3 Avon dealer (for Marksam)
4 DEI dealer (for Marksam)

4 movies you could watch over and over:
1 The Lion King
2 Fiddler on the Roof
3 Passion of The Christ
4 The Godfather

4 places you have lived:
1 Quezon City, Philippines
2 n/a
3 n/a
4 n/a

4 TV shows you love to watch:
1 Law and Order
2 Bewitched
3 Daria (no longer showing.. damn)
4 Kids Next Door

4 places you've been on holiday:
1 Singapore
2 Vancouver, Canada
3 Los Angeles, CA
4 China

4 websites you visit daily:
1 Friend's blogs
2 You Tube
3 Yahoo
4 Friendster

4 of your favorite foods:
1 Grilled Lambchops
2 Sweet and Sour Pork
3 Steamed Fish in Soy Sauce
4 Lemon Chicken

4 places you'd rather be:
1 In a library
2 Beijing, China
3 Palawan
4 Canada

4 lucky people to tag:
1 Jourdan
2 Hazel
3 Ben
4 Christel

Now, back to our regular programming...

Shopping With The Boys

This morning, I kept bothering the people in our org to accompany me to a nearby mall so I can purchase a couple of doodahs.. thankfully, Jourdan and Marlon volunteered to be my grocery boys - and thankfully, they didn't back out when it began to rain and we had to get a bit wet to hail a taxi.

When we arrived, I led the boys to where I intended to buy the CD filers which I needed so badly. Along the way, the guys saw a couple of items which they thought would be good gifts for their friend (whose having his birthday today - Happy Birthday James!) or themselves. The stuff were bought within 15 to 20 minutes, with a couple more things being considered in their heads.

When I got to the Japanese Home Center, I chose the CD pouches I wanted to buy and we were all out of the store in five minutes.

We had a late lunch (well the boys did). I just tried to steal their soup - which tasted rather nasty by the way. After a seemingly lengthy conversation, Marlon and Jourdan decided to return to the earlier store we visited to get the items they had debated buying.

After their purchase, they accompanied me to a computer store to buy a headphone set - and after a couple of inquiries, I got the device and we were on our way out of the mall and back to school.

Total Time? 1 hour and 30 minutes..

No nonesense.

No "I-wanna-look-at-the-next-store-please"
No "Can-I-try-this-on-first?"
No "I-really-want-it-buts..."

I call this shopping trip.. fun, fast and simply efficient!

You Know What Sucks?

Spending days on end thinking about the perfect choreography combination to help your friend.

Freaking out almost every moment for minute details that they require to secure victory.

Text away your balance to make sure their needed items would be present for their performance.

Negotiate with security officers just in case the planned surprise would push through.

Screaming your head off to score them some audience impact points.

Going backstage trying to show some support.

Then once prizes have been given away,

go home alone in a public transportation vehicle at 11pm.. while they're wasting away in celebration.

(okay, so it's my fault anyway, i didn't want to go celebrate.. i was freakin tired.. and i didn't want to spoil their enthusiasm and fun.. stupid, stupid, stupid kat.. - at least they said thank you... not like somebody out there!!)

I Am Not Mathematically Challenged After All!

Yesterday I got the boost of confidence I needed.

Being a liberal arts student, we've been often labeled as ones who are brilliant in conversational skills, at the same time, poor in computing complex mathematical problems. (bah, humbug..)

I've been performing quite badly in most of my financing and accounting subjects which somehow made me believe that I really do fit in the stereotype. (Even though, I am aware that I am very capable in handling complicated and analytical problems, I always end up boxing myself into reasoning that I am really mathematically challenged whenever I get a failing mark.)

As one of our finance professor's gimiks, she devised a group contest to test our understanding of our lesson. I didn't read the chapted much so I wasn't able to help the group much with the objective portion of the contest - but when we were asked to compute for the answers to her problems, I consistently gave them the correct sum in the fastest pace.

I guess I ain't that dumb in math after all! In your face... bwahaha....

This Is What I Get For Skipping Class

Yeah, so I skipped class the whole day yesterday.. to meet my 12 noon deadline for the bulletin board.. and to satisfy the peer pressure to go to Mall of Asia.. (it's my first time!)

So my high school friends and I had loads of fun.. Jourdy even accompanied us in our spur of the moment outing. We had dinner at Burgoo.. and it's simply embarassing the way we blasted out all sorts of greenishness in public. Even the waiter was laughing at us since we (Marjorie and I) were fighting over the crayons to draw on the paper covering the table.

Eventually, dinner ends and I think we all got a bit drunk with humor that while trying to get back into the airconditioned portion of the mall.. I walked into a glass panel! Splat in the face! You could just imagine how loud Marjorie laughed once I got inside.. I feel that her voice could be heard all the way to the end of the mall.. Thankfully, being with close friends decrease the whole humiliating effect caused by one's carelessness...

Trying On New Shoes

*This is my reaction paper regarding one of our activities in our Genders class called Gender Role Violation wherein we are expected to act a little differently from our normal behaviors. I took note of two of our professors tasks for females which are:

(1)"Go an entire week without wearing makeup, not even lip gloss OR if you are used to baring it all, then you have to wear makeup for a week" and

(2)"Overcoming the "disease to please": Learn to say "no" with courage and grace to the demands of other people on you (To help you set your personal boundaries and determine your true priorities). Please do not use this exercise as your main reason/excuse for saying no. Say no because you cannot or do not want to do what is being asked of you."...

This is what I felt, how I was reacted to and my perspective regarding femininty, culture and the like.

Amongst my high school sphere of friends, I am the only one who is completely ignorant of the proper use of make-ups, night-out fashions and flashy accessories. I would often attend my classes in loose boyish shirts, loose fitting pants, a pair of trusty rubber shoes and a good worn out backpack – with my hair either poorly combed or pony tailed. Although I do have occasional deviations from my usual fashion statement, I’d often stick to the concept of comfort before style.

A couple of Saturdays ago, intending to go clubbing with my group, my girlfriends seemed very pleased when I asked their help to doll me up by choosing my clothing combinations and its appropriate jewelries. In truth, my friends have little to say about my sudden interest in “looking good”, although they did give a couple of hoots once in a while.

To be completely honest, being prepped up kept me on edge for most of the adventure since I had to constantly take a peep at the mirror if my lipstick is fading, or if my cheeks are beginning to pale up. It didn’t feel me at all, I felt restricted into fulfilling the role of a Barbie doll.

Needing to wear make-up for the remainder of the week, even just the cinnamon red lipstick, did give rise to a couple of queries from close friends, while the rest, thankfully kept mum – or perhaps they are aware how much it annoys me whenever people make mountains out of insignificant molehills.

Similarly, I couldn’t keep up with the pressure of having to do retouches regarding my facial colors. Most of the time, I’d apply the lipstick before I depart from our house and forget all about how I’d appear for the rest of the day.

In my opinion, the myth that women should be constantly in a beauty pageant demeanor is appalling, since even the most civilized woman has an untamed edge (id) within her which she needs to permit a few tantrums, because keeping it constantly in check (superego), may result in more devastating psychological complications. My point simply is, when women go out into the social world, she is not expected to be always stiff with all the rules of society, what matters is that she enjoys the dynamism of her sexuality at the same time balancing it with propriety and discipline. My definition of discipline being, that she should be capable of defining her limitations before going on an all-out frenzy.

Knowing that there is a thin line between being liberal and being just plain stupid, I believe, given our current mindset, women are capable of being expressive of their thoughts and opinions – thus meaning in both verbal communication and their actions.

I have my fair share of “saying no” to suggestions I find faulty – although such a case cannot hold true when it comes to dealing with parents. There may be occasional undesirable remarks from others regarding my outgoing perspectives regarding sex and rebellion, but despite those split-second shocks, most of my male peers (and females) respect me for my ability to give voice to my thoughts – and that is perhaps the new evolution of thought in our maturing generation.

Considering my conservative Christian family background, coupled by education in a traditional Chinese institution, I have to put into consideration that I was also taught by my parents that I am capable of exercising my rights as a free citizen of the country as long as I am willing to face the consequences that are attached with my choice. I believe that the wisdom that such a situation allowed me to explore is -the ability to seek the balance between free expression and propriety, which would somehow keep me in the right track.

Dead Line

There is little I can mention today aside from the fact that this is the second day of the annual recruitment week for the organizations in our university. I have barely lifted a finger to help in setting up, I'm just often at the booth to get a couple of photos of myself. (vanity is my sin.) Tomorrow will be the bulk of the week-long event, the University break where all the students have an hour and a half free of classes, and thus also - the sudden demanded deadline of the bulletin board.

Out of desperation perhaps, Marie accompanied me (take note: riding a MegaTaxi) to Masagana, a class C-D convenience mall, to buy cheap art materials. The pressure is on since I am completely unsure how I intend to execute the whole thing. I'd be cramming my way with the preparations all night tonight and I wonder how I will manage to complete the task by 12 noon tomorrow. Spontaniety and spur of the moment "lightbulbs" are out of the question.. Can't take chances.. Another sleepless night..

I hate sleeping late but needing to wake up early.

Dad...

Belated Happy Father's Day to all the Daddies out there..

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Days before last Sunday, I was listening to Bob Carlisle's Butterfly Kisses and suprisingly I got the humor of my siblings because I began shedding tears uncontrollably. I couldn't explain why but hearing the song from a "father's" perspective.. seeing your little girl, the one that would fall off her bike if you're supporting it from the back, or the one who'd draw you and your wife's faces almost everyday like you're the perpetual idol up in her pedestal..all grown up and trying her wings.. feels crushing at the same time uplifting..

I really couldn't say if I'm my daddy's girl, but surely I know that, being the first born, I have advantages that my other siblings could and would never have. When I was born, my dad was in the midst of his photography frenzy, his 80's music filled life, his obsessive fresh father enthusiasm.

I remember dad dedicating all sorts of stupid sounding songs to me.. as Police's De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da.

I remember dad giving me my remarkably stupid sounding nickname from my very first word.. A-pprrtt which evolved into "Agoo".

I remember dad reading me "The Three Little Pigs" while I was lying in my cradle. (I don't know how I remember, I just know)

I remember dad carrying me on his shoulders.. making me feel like I was seven feet high.. (especially since my dad is 6 feet tall).

I remember dad punishing me by making me sit on the sofa for over five hours without permission to stand up, while he brought my mom and brother (just one, then) to the carnival.

I remember dad talking to me when I did something bad, rationalizing the situation rather than hitting me with a belt.

I remember dad taking me on a motorcycle ride around our block six times on my 6th birthday since, according to my Chinese zodiac, I wasn't allowed to leave the house else misfortune befalls me.

I remember dad running after me after I caught him doing something bad and trying to explain the situation to me from his point of view.

Now, imagining those broken families of single mothers or divorced absentee fathers.. how much have those children missed.

Unmotivated Sloth

Okay, so the bulletin boards are back.. so I'd have to start making the magic.. and so far.. the word I could describe myself these days is.. uninspired.. and perhaps, unmotivated.

So sure that I already had my design approved, inclusion of the color schemes - and sure, I already know how the whole thing is meant to go together.. but somehow something inside of me is just plain dead.. bored.. simply unmotivated.

Is it the weather? or the people? Searching for the answer in the darkness of my head.

Killing Me Softly

It is said that in life, there will always be new faces coming with some old ones fading into the oblivion of our minds. Sometimes we forget who we were. Sometimes we find ourselves reminiscing about the moments where everything seemed in place - when at that point in our past life, we know that that is not exactly the perspective we were taking. Sometimes we crave for those times to somehow revive and become part of our lives again - but of course, such could never be. We just have to keep moving on. We just have to keep living. But I don't think that means we just keep forgetting..

This entry is dedicated for all the people that have somehow touched my life in the past decades of my existence.. All who've came and gone, who've remembered and forgotten. I miss you all...

Ben
It's been months since we've had our mind boggling chatters. I miss the times when we were in school together debating about everything and anything, never seeming to lose any potential subject, never seeming to decide which side to take - but eventually we end up contradicting each other. I miss the times when I would ride in his car on my way home, making fun of it for its old fashioned quality, and yet equally gracious that it always manages to bring me home in time for my curfew. For the times, we'd scream our lungs out trying to belt out rock songs which are apparently out of our reach... For our stubborn arguements, knowing somebody would eventually give in anyway... I miss those times.

Steve
Ben's duo, the husky boy who I have few but meaningful conversations with. My fondest memory of him was running after me with a bucketful of water to throw on my head while we were hustling about during our teambuilding days. Those memories can never be recreated.. and I so wish they could be..

Charley
The jack-ass who keeps doing the stupidest stunts ever and still survives to brag about it. The pain-in-the-butt who always teases me until I want to pull all his hair off his head. The loud noisy boy who never seems to run out of the darnest and funniest things to say.. But also, the nice guy who brought me home in a taxi on my birthday with my birthday cake and flowers since it was already late at night - and was open enough to share his life stories. The "Crunch" guy.

Chester
The "Kinder" guy. My ultimate pre-mature college crush, the reason for my enthusiasm in staying in the organization hang-out areas, the reason why I became so boisterous and annoyingly green. I don't think I would've appreciated the organization as much had it not been for his dedication to the organization back when I was in first year college. I guess college life has never been the same since he graduated. There's barely anyone in the campus to crush on, especially now that I'm a senior - the stalking, kilig, happy-to-see-my-crush-make-my-day moments are gone.. and I miss those simple frustrations.

Fred
The loud mouth of Englicom who never seems to run out of blasphemously interesting tales and trivias, whose laugh resonates up to the second floor of our college building, who has molded many fine memories for me despite our lack of conversation. I miss the fat jolly man.

The Past Englicom Choir
The group of inspiring singers who has fulfilled the Fredian dream. No group could ever compare to your prowess as well as your noise and laughter.

Susanna
My highschool best peer, who could spend afternoons after afternoons, tirelessly composing poems with me about our boring teachers, hesitantly following my pranks, throwing chalks at people from the quadrangle balcony, writing codes with me - which only the two of us could understand, playing boy games with her excelling so much. I miss being unique and accepted - something I could only feel when we're together with our unbridled creativity. After college, communication was breached.. so sad..

Eleazar
The Edge man who always is willing to help me out when I need some aid. The first guy ever who managed to carry me like some King Kong muscleman. The cute guy who I could never imagine to have turned down. The "dick-kicker" who comes up with all the quotable quotes that always makes anyone who copies it sound intellectually cool or unforgivably dumb. Things are not the same since graduation.

Reagan "Boogan"
The sweet guy who could never find the right girl. The constant searcher with a new flower in perspective per week. The guy who taught me most of the "moves" and sweet chatter. The guy who I have always laughed at for being nerve wreckingly immature, and has the temper to match my own. The guy who I constantly teased and I think has not forgiven me up to this very day. Parting ways, sometimes though kiddingly seems to make my life a lot more quiet, is still heartbreaking, knowing that one day we may never recognize each other again.

Christine aka. Chrimi
The lesbian magnet. The one who makes up the boldest pranks and gets away with them. The one who greeted me on my first day of class with a friendly, "Hello classmate!" The one who has taught me the pleasures of Christina Aguilera's voice in contrast with Britney Spears'. The outrageous freak in our group. I miss you.

Heilyn
The groove maker of our high school group - constantly making up the weirdest gimiks that keeps us all wacky with folly. The "Precious" who received anonymous love letters in white pad papers - keeping them so tenderly unknowing that it was one of our stupid jokes. The one who always gets locked inside the classrooms with a "force" prohibiting us to assist her in any manner. The patient victim who always ends up laughing rather than angry at our insensitive immaturity. I miss this girl so.

I know there are so many more people I'd like to list down and mention.. How much memories they've created with me, and how troubling it is to think that we've no longer seen each other for quite a period.

For all those people... I miss you all so much...

Travel Suites

Give me unlimited supply of money and a choice to stay at any hotel in the world... These are going to be my choices....

1920's Cottar Camp

Soneva Gilli

and last but definitely not least... (this hotel can never be excluded!)
Burj Al Arab

I don't think I'd have to justify why these locations are listed in my... must-stay-for-at-least-one-night-before-I-die list..

Until then.. sigh...

Perhaps Love...

A friend forwarded me this email (so I can't give due credit to its original composer) a few years back - and while cleaning up my e-mail, I found it. I was glad that I kept it. It does hold truth in it.. allowing us to reflect on the misconceptions of the most mistakenly used word - love...

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For all you people who say "I love you" when you have no clue what love is exactly, this is something to ponder upon..... Check it out. Some people really need to read this

Are your palms sweaty, is your heart racing and is your voice caught within your chest??
It isn't love, it's like.
You can't keep your eyes or hands off of them, am I right??
It isn't love, it's lust.
Are you proud, and eager to show them off??
It isn't love, it's luck.
Do you want them because you know they're there??
It isn't love, it's loneliness.
Are you there because it's what everyone wants??
It isn't love, it's loyalty.
Are you there because they kissed you, or held your hand??
It isn't love, it's low confidence.
Do you stay for their confessions of love, because you don't want to hurt them??
It isn't love, it's pity.
Do you belong to them because their sight makes your heart skip a beat??
It isn't love, its infatuation.
Do you pardon their faults because you care about them??
It isn't love, it's friendship.
Do you tell them every day they are the only one you think of??
It isn't love, it's a lie.
Are you willing to give all of your favorite things for their sake??
It isn't love, it's charity.

Does your heart ache and break when they're sad??
Then it's love.
Do you cry for their pain, even when they're strong??
Then it's love.
Do their eyes see your true heart, and touch your soul so deeply it hurts??
Then it's love.
Do you stay because a blinding, incomprehensible mix of pain and realization pulls you close and holds you there??
Then it's love.
Do you accept their faults because they're a part of who they are??
Then it's love.
Are you attracted to others, but stay with them faithfully without regret??
Then it's love.
Would you give them your heart, your life, your death??
Then it's love.

Now, if love is painful, and tortures us so, why do we love? Why is it all we search for in life? This pain, this agony? Why is it all we long for?

This torture, this powerful death of self? Why? The answer is so simple.. because it's...LOVE. It is such an addictive thing that even people who are do not have it wish to experience it and share it with others as well.

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It makes you think... doesn't it?

"Ten Top Tips"

My aunt just came back from England with a handful of free paraphernalias and magazines for me. She gave me bunches of menus, recipe booklets and food dietary programs. Of course, the one leaflet I got my eyes glued on was the "Ten Top Tips" to weight reduction "based on scientific evidence" which was distributed by the Cancer Research UK and Weight Concern. (Or I think they were the distributors since those were the organizations given substatial amount of attention)

So I'd like to copy and post the ten reminders in order to lose weight:
(1) Keep to your meal routine
- Try to eat at roughly the same times each day, whether this is two or five times a day.

(2) Go reduced fat
- Choose reduced fat versions of foods such as dairy products, spreads and salad dressings where you can. Use them sparingly as some can still be high in fat.

(3) Walk off the weight
- Walk 10,000 steps (equivalent to 60-90 minutes moderate activity) each day. You can break up your walking throughout the day.

(4) Pack a healthy snack
- If you snack, choose a healthy option such as fresh fruit or low calorie yogurts instead of chocolate or crisps.

(5) Look at the labels
- Be careful about food claims. Check the fat and sugar content on food labels when shopping and preparing food.

(6) Caution with your portions
- Don't heap food on you plate (except vegetables). Think twice before having second helpings.

(7) Up on your feet
- Break up your sitting time. Stand up for ten minutes out of every hour.

(8) Think about your drinks.
- Choose water or sugar-free squashes. Unsweetened fruit juice is high in natural sugar so limit it to 1 glass per day (200 ml.) Alcohol is high in calories so try to limit the amount you drink.

(9) Focus on your food
- Slow down. Don't eat on the go or while watching tv. Eat at a table if possible.
*Eating meals at the table will help you to focus on the amount of food you eat.

(10) Don't forget your 5 a day
- Eat at least 5 portions of fruit and vegetables a day (400 g in total)
* A medium sized apple or banana or 3 serving spoonfuls of peas is 1 portion.

Sounds easy enough... :D
Happy dieting...

Sorry Is The Hardest Word

To all the robbers, snatchers, stealers, dukot-ers, holduppers, kleptomaniacs out there....

The least you could do is say sorry! :(

You can't imagine all the financial and emotional distress you've caused me...

First Photoshop Masterpieces

Finally, I finished my photoshop poster. My firsts actually.

This poster is the very first one I finished. But unfortunately, my VP didn't like it much - more so, the theme and concept - that I felt that I had to redo the whole thing into something less worthy of her critism.

So I came up with this. My hon suggested that to change the 16th note into a "normal" one to really stick with the minimalist theme.. I think it came out relatively well...

What do you think?

Is There Anything Wrong With Me?

Recently, people have been coming up to me and telling me that I appear to have lost weight. True enough, checking the scale, I did lose 10 lbs. How? I have no idea, to be honest. Unfortunately, even with such a positive change, I don't feel any healthier nor do I feel any stronger as a whole - on the contrary, according to my mother, I look completely drained, having a "thesis look", with a face breeding pesky pimples.

I've been eating all three meals a day, sticking diligently to a daily hygiene ritual, sleeping before 11pm - I wonder why I feel a lot more fragile now than when I was 10 pounds heavier?

I have a smaller appetite compared to before, and I experience fatigue more easily when I have to carry heavy loads (as the electronic piano for today's choir practice..)

Sigh.....